It happens more often than it ever should. A perfectly delightful evening out is ruined because someone has decided they have a right to subject anyone and everyone to their offspring's antics. Perhaps they have become desensitized to the seemingly never ending cacophony, but I find it hard to believe that they could be unaware of the fact that they have effectively sentenced everyone else to join them in their very special, pint-sized hell. As an example, I submit an all too familier story of a family outing:
The Boy, the step-daughter and I went out for what should have been a delightful hibachi dinner. After a short wait, we were seated at a table and began looking over the menu. The hostess attempted to seat a group of trendy, 20-something hipsters with us, but they declined saying "we don't want to be crowded", so we got to keep the table all to ourselves. Thus far it had been a casual, entertaining outing, and I was very much looking forward to some fresh fried rice and yummy steak. This should have been my first clue that something was about to go horribly, horribly wrong.
At the table behind us was a young couple with their plump, bow-adorned baby...who had taken it upon herself to keen at the top of her little lungs. I'm fairly certain that she must have actually been battery operated because I don't recall her ever stopping to take a breath, and the noise that was emanating from her distorted maw was not a sound a human should make. That, in and of itself, was irritating. The fact that mommy and daddy were content to simply let her tire herself out while they continued calmly chowing down, was infuriating. Add in the fact that management didn't have the balls to do anything about the offending party, and that vein on my right temple that tends to pulsate when I'm agitated was about to pop.
Everyone in the place was obviously being disturbed by both their squalling piglet and lack of concern. After about 15 minutes one of the waiters trepidatiously edged over and sheepishly mumbled a half-hearted suggestion that they perhaps try walking her around or something to calm her down. Daddy just kept bouncing her on his knee (which, by the way, was only making it worse as this jerky motion just made her howling reverberate through the dining room a la 'Crimson and Clover') and he insisted she was just tired and cranky. We took about another ten minutes of this private hell before getting so fed up with the lack of initiative and consideration of both the parents and management that we got up and left (ok, so the Boy might have drug me out before I doused the kid in teriyaki and threw her on the grill...same thing).
Now, I'm certain that there are people out there that would believe that the fault lay exclusively with the parents. Please let me assure you; this is not the case. It is the management's responsibility to do everything in their power to ensure the majority of their patrons enjoy their meal. While we would expect management to step in with a drunk and belligerent patron, so should we expect them to step in with disturbing children. Some parents may not be understanding, even be offended when asked to take their annoying, screaming, unruly child outside; but I can pretty much guarantee that every other person paying the same amount of money to enjoy a quiet meal will thank them.
To all you parents out there: I don't go to places like Chuck E Cheese's expecting a quiet dining experience with fine wine and well prepared food. Walking in with those types of unreasonable expectations mean it's my own damn fault when my evening is ruined. This is the kind of logic you must also use when choosing a place to eat. If you insist on bringing your child to eat with you, either choose a restaurant geared toward keeping small children occupied, or be prepared to cut your dinner short when your child has thrown some sort of tantrum and you're disturbing the rest of the patrons (because you had to have adult food, but were too cheap to spring for a babysitter.) Here's a helpful tip: Chances are that if your dining establishment of choice does not have animated rodents, skee ball, or a mini pool filled with colorful, plastic balls, it is not acceptable to allow your child to cry itself to sleep at the table or run laps around the floor plan.
It all goes back to the age old saying: The needs of the many out-weigh the needs of the few.
***Now, if you are one of those breeders who feel everyone else should curb their needs in lieu of your precious baby's, please feel free to out yourself as both a moron and a bad parent by posting a comment. Do not, however, expect anything more than to be laughed at mercilessly.***
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